Why do some people increasingly dislike socializing?
There are always people around us who would say: "The human heart is too complicated. I have truly made efforts, but I am always misunderstood."
And some people say that they would rather establish connections with animals and plants because those relationships are simple, pure and without any calculation.
This sentence made me start thinking -
Is loneliness really a kind of misfortune?
Loneliness is not a flaw; rather, it is a kind of "causal simplicity".
From a philosophical perspective, if a person has few close relatives and "friends", it might not mean that he is not good enough, but rather that he has "few debts" to repay in this life.
In other words, he doesn't have to be bound by a complex network of interpersonal relationships.
Those people around you who seem to be "extremely well-connected" and bustling with activity are sometimes like puppets held by a causal chain, busy but unable to truly be themselves.
But when you are as free as the wind, not repaying emotional debts to anyone, not being crushed by anyone -
You actually gain a higher level of freedom.
A Real Case: Living Richly in Solitude
What impressed me most was the story of the video blogger "Wang Yizai in Thailand".
After losing her husband, she was once depressed. By chance, she went to Thailand to relax and immediately fell in love with the country. Then, in Chiang Mai, Thailand, she began a completely new life.
She said, "I found a place where I want to stay. My mood suddenly became bright and cheerful:
"People can live this way - not having to follow others' expectations, not having to flatter or please anyone."
She wore a bikini and sunbathed in solitude, stopped dyeing her hair white, and went on self-driving trips everywhere.
She shared her life, recommended good things, and managed to balance work and self-contentment. She lived out a brand new self.
This is not being isolated, but a composure cultivated in solitude.
Solitude is a scarce ability, and even more so a blessing.
The ability to gain satisfaction in solitude is an extremely rare quality.
Knowing how to enjoy solitude is not only a way of life, but also a wisdom for handling affairs, and even a kind of blessing.
Many people spend their entire lives navigating interpersonal relationships and sacrificing themselves in the world of fame and fortune. Even with good financial conditions, they rarely have a moment of peace.
However, those who truly enjoy being alone can act according to their own will, maintain the independence of their personality, and remain true to themselves.
【Not afraid of body tired, afraid of heart tired】
Sanmao’s reminder: Friendship cannot deplete your spiritual water.
Just as the renowned deceased female writer Sanmao wrote in "The Rain Season No Longer Comes":
"Some friendships are like depleting our spiritual water. Some friendships, however, are like elevating our spiritual realm. If we cannot resonate with each other, it's better to be alone."
The connection between people, if it fails to bring resonance, is better to maintain a distance.
Connecting with animals and plants, on the other hand, is closer to the essence.
The best state of a person: inner abundance and tranquility.
When we were young, we sought outside and exerted all our efforts to be recognized.
As we grow older, we gradually realize that going towards our own hearts is the most important thing.
If you are surrounded by a group of friends playing mahjong and spend your entire day "wasting time" on it, how would you feel? The most precious time in the world is thus wasted away.
If you remain in such an environment every day, you will inevitably be influenced subconsciously.
Therefore, enjoy your solitude to the fullest. If you can't adapt, then choose to leave.
【The best state of life, is rich quiet!】
Conclusion: You don't have to live like others expect you to.
How one lives ultimately depends on one's background and choices.
When you enjoy solitude while she is still filling her life with excitement, such a clash doesn't need to be forcibly reconciled.
The best state of an individual is to be rich and peaceful within.
Not being influenced by others' emotions, not maneuvering in others' world.
Everything seen is peaceful and at ease.